the Doing Cure

The Talking Cure is a term coined, according to Wikipedia, in the 1800s by a lady who was cured of her 'hysteria' by talking with a therapist.  For all the merits of talking, a meaningful life must also have some Doing in it.  A lot of times we don't 'DO' because we've told ourselves we must do something Big and Important.  Maybe we got that message from our parents. Maybe we got it from TV.  Maybe we made it up ourselves because we have a wish to be Big and Important.

Here are two people, with outward similarities, who have Done or Are Doing, 'small' things that, I believe, are meaningful in Big and Surprising ways because they connect people with one another and with a sense of joy and love.  The first is Larry Selman, who's obituary appeared in yesterday's New York Times, http://www.nytimes.com/2013/01/25/nyregion/larry-selman-a-shepherd-of-greenwich-village-dies-at-70.html?ref=obituaries&_r=0  He was a someone well known in his neighborhood of Greenwich Village because of his "prodigious work as a neighborhood fund-raiser. From 1970 until his death he collected more than $300,000 by some estimates — from people he approached in the Village, one at a time, requesting donations of $1 and $2 each. He collected money for St. Vincent’s Hospital, the families of Sept. 11 victims, Muscular Dystrophy research, AIDS research, Kiwanis International projects and animal rescue groups, among others."  Mr. Selman also happened to have an IQ of 62 and after losing both his parent in the 1960s worked very hard with the help of his uncle to live independently throughout his life.  If you have the chance to read his obituary, something I admired about him is the way he brought his neighborhood together and helped people feel connected with one another and with him.

My second 'Do-er' is Grace, who, with her family have adopted a bus stop in Glendale, Missouri.  That's right.  A bus stop.  https://www.facebook.com/pages/Graces-Glendale-Bus-Stop/116072348526169  If you haven't seen it or live outside of St. Louis, you should check out her facebook page.  It is such a treat to drive by and wonder what she is going to do next, how she is going to celebrate a holiday, or honor an occasion.  Driving by and seeing her latest 'I Too Have a Dream' in honor of MLK Day was a moment of joy and inspiration for me.  Grace also connects people with one another, gives them a sense of community, joy, and play.

Here is something I believe:  You can DO something loving, joyful and inspired even in the midst of the rest of your life, which might feel at times sad, hard or stuck.  Just choose a little thing and do it.  It takes courage, but if you look around, you will find so many inspiring people who have had courage before you.  It will be the cure for what ails you and maybe help somebody else along the way.

decide what to be and go be it

I had intended to write something Christmas-y, something about advent, about family, about slowing down. But. When I sat down to think and write, what is inspiring to me today seems more New Years-y.
I read an article in this week's New Yorker, http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2010/12/20/101220fa_fact_hessler about a Peace Corps advocate, Rajeev Goyal, and his unorthodox tactics in advocating for increased funding for the Peace Corps. He is a former volunteer himself, who was able to get running water in a village in Nepal. Now, back in the United States, he works for Peace Corps funding in Washington, D.C., using a "village" approach. He doesn't utilize a normal chain of hierarchy to reach those in power, he attempts to speak directly with members of congresss, etc., by knowing who they are and approaching them at Starbucks, waiting for them after committee meetings, finding mutual acquaintances to make introductions, and so on. He has come under some criticism for being so forthright and eschewing hierarchy and 'the way we do things,', but he also has helped increase funding significantly.
I love this guy.
What inspires me (and I hope you) when I read about Rajeev is that he seems to have two attributes that I think are worth searching for in our own lives: 1) he has passion for something outside 'the self' and 2) he has a unique vision and drive to make it so. It reminds me of an Avett Brothers lyric (if you're not familiar with the Avett Brothers, I think they are a great band http://www.avettbrothers.com/ ). They're kind of altcountry/rock and their lyrics appeal to the poet in me. Anyway, the lyrics I'm thinking of are these: "I had a dream/one day I could see it/like a bird in a cage I broke in/ and demanded that somebody free it". Another good line is, "decide what to be and go be it."
Now that I'm thinking about it, this entry might actually be a little Christmas-y - I'm thinking about dreams - personal dreams, dreams for peace on Earth (what better practical application for peace on Earth than the Peace Corps?!), inspiration, putting hierarchy in its place (Jesus was also an advocate, gadfly and questioner of authority).
And this, I suppose, is the New Years-y piece: if you find yourself stymied or at a frustrating life standstill, the new year is a good time to examine your dreams. Make sure they're really yours and not someone else's for you. Gregory Bateson was an anthropologist among other degrees and areas of study, who talked about the "difference that makes the difference." He was a great mind and at the risk of bungling his meaning, I'll say what I take from that phrase (as I learned it in grad school): in any system, a life, a family, a community - one small change can create a big change. In 2011, if you feel you need a change, don't be overwhelmed. One little change, one question asked, one mile walked, can make all the difference.
Best wishes for happy holidays and peace in the new year.